Just before Christmas 2006 my youngest son was asked to leave a Rudolf Steiner school as they felt that they could not cope with his "considerable" learning difficulties. This piece of earth shattering news was delivered via a brusque phone call from his teacher at 7am. He was to leave at the end of term (some 10 days away) but in the end he lasted only 3 more days.
My son is dyslexic, and despite my offers to come into the classroom and be a one-on-one assistant to him, his teacher refused, saying that this was inappropriate. His behaviour in class was terrible and quite frankly she wanted rid of him at all costs. I was called to the school on what was to be his last day as an actual pupil to bring him home as he was refusing to come in from outside. I arrived at school in the pouring rain to find no-one had any idea where he was. I did eventually find him, another teacher had taken him back to his classroom, and we went home to talk.
He had refused to come in as his teacher had been yelling at him, blaming him for something he had not done and was calling him stupid. I was told of how every time he didn't manage to grasp an idea fast enough he would be shouted at, and even made to go and stand outside the classroom for the rest of the lesson. The teacher would call him stupid, and she told me that every new thing was a huge hurdle to him. His confidence was at rock bottom. He felt in himself that he was stupid and no use to man nor beast, at the ripe old age of 8!
It has taken me 2 years to de-school him. You will often hear this term bandied about in home education circles, and it simply refers to the undoing of all the harm that has been done to the child by their experience of formal schooling. It is not a process that can be rushed, and you just have to go with the flow, try not to panic and force the child to do anything and wait. We are now in a position to move on autonomously with our first chosen subject, animation.
I was fortunate to receive copies of the 5-14 curriculum (Scotland) and National curriculum (England and Wales) through freecycle, as well as on line access to the Steiner school curriculum. As a home educator I am not bound to follow any specific curriculum, but I found having the information to hand very reassuring in the early days so that I had an idea of where he stood in relation to other children his age. As he was in a fee paying school, there was no need for me to go to the authorities to request permission to take him out of school, so I am not subject to any inspections, or given any hoops to jump through.
I have managed to make contact with, and join the very active and energetic home education community in my area, which allows us to experience educational trips in a group that enjoys all the additional benefits of a class trip, but without the restrictions of teaching to a curriculum. We meet fortnightly, for field trips and for hall based meetings, and we provide a source of inspiration and support for one another. We have recently started up a parents group as well, so we can exchange ideas and discuss issues we might prefer that the children were not involved in.
As for the question I am always asked "what about socialisation?" my son is the most popular child in the street, he has many friends of all different ages, a peer group in our home education group and is a member of the Scouting movement. He is more socialised than an "average" school child kept in a classroom with kids the same age as themselves, driven to and from school, and then sitting playing computer games in the evening!
